The Anti-"Blurred Lines"

Let's talk about rape culture in popular music again. No wait, don't leave! This isn't going to make you mad by calling out current hits with the old "Blurred Lines" problem (though there are certainly a couple for which I could point out some problems re: their views on women). Instead, I thought I'd look at a song that's trying to do it right.



That is "Text Me in the Morning" by Neon Trees. If you've heard of them, it was probably due to one of their two big singles "Animal" (which was on Glee in season 2, back when the show could really move the pop charts) or "Everybody Talks" (which was also on Glee, but in season 4... so let's join everyone else in pretending that never happened, shall we?)

Glee jokes aside, both are good songs, and I've been a fan since I heard "Animal", so it's nice to see that their third album Pop Psychology, probably my favorite so far, is doing very well, and it includes the aforementioned "Text Me in the Morning". So what do I mean by calling it the Anti-"Blurred Lines"? Let's look at the song.

It opens as a seemingly typical "get drunk and hook up" fantasy song from the perspective of a man dancing with a woman:

We danced a tango 'till our heads got dizzy
I felt your body heat: a damsel in distress
My daddy warned me not to get so busy
And suddenly I'm watching you take off your dress

This could be the beginning to a very problematic song. The "dizzy" reads as a reference to getting drunk, disregarding consequences, and the "damsel in distress" trope is its own whole can of worms (for an in-depth look at that, I refer you to this series of videos). Plus, he's such a cool rebel, defying authority in the form of his "daddy" warning him about the consequences and considerations of "get[ting] so busy". But who cares because, hey-oh, looks like he's about to get laid! Party on, dude! And... wait, she's taking off her own dress? The woman in the song has agency and appears to be the one initiating the sexual encounter? How refreshing. Well, where could the story go from there but into the details of their sordid drunken hook up?

I couldn't stick around

Huh. So I guess he doesn't want the sexual encounter, so he leaves. Or maybe even though he'd like to stay, he couldn't because, I don't know, he has to be at work tomorrow morning or something. Either way, that's a responsible and commendable decision. But we're coming to the chorus, maybe he relents and stays anyway? That would be typical, right? No actually, instead

So text me in the morning
Tell me you still love me
I don't believe a single word
You tell me you're tipsy; 
I tell you you're pretty
We could spend the night if you're still sure
But text me in the morning

So let me get this straight. He thinks she's "pretty", and would love to "spend the night", but he perceives that while she says she's only "tipsy" her behavior otherwise (probably including, among other clues, the sudden, unexpected removal of clothing), indicates that she's so drunk he "doesn't believe a single word". I grant that this could have a couple interpretations, but I read it as meaning he decides she seems too drunk to give consent. So, not only does he not sleep with her anyway, he takes the time to explain, presumably gets her squared away, maybe even puts her to bed, and either tells her or leaves her a note saying that if, when she sobers up, she's still interested in him, then she can "text him in the morning" to arrange a more meaningful encounter (I'm leaning towards note, given how sure he wants to be that she gets the message). Cut to the next morning, as the girl wakes up.

Woke up all soaking wet from last night's fever
Smelling like cigarettes and broken promises
Your mother said: 'Don't be an overachiever.'
I please her, oh please girl, I never did believe her
And I'll never tell you why
Oh, I'll never tell a lie

Imagine the tone if the post-hookup vibe was described as "last night's fever / Smelling like cigarettes and broken promises". Yeah, it would be troubling if we didn't know that nothing actually happened (though it seems she's not sure of that–perhaps she blacked out, making the speaker's choice even more clearly correct). The next line about the mother seems non sequitur at first, but it seems the speaker does know this girl at least a little bit. They are not just strangers as we had first assumed. He is aware to some degree of an internalized screwed up gender dynamics (passed on from society as represented by her mother, just like the father is for him), which seems to be that she should focus mainly on getting a man, hence why the the mother is theoretically pleased that the daughter has snared a man's attention, rather than being an "overachiever", but the speaker rejects that, begging the girl to understand that he never believed this societal message. Perhaps it's a stretch, but the subtext seems to be saying that he wants her to be successful and complete in her own right as a human being, rather than some object for him to desire or play with. After this assertion, he makes a promise to "never tell a lie", which is a reason for her to "text [him] in the morning" and from that segue the chorus repeats. Then we cut to the speaker the next morning.

Tears on my phone
Feelin' so alone
I'll never let you go, you've got the best of me
When all the other boys just want your sex
I just want your texts
In the morning

We learn this speaker is not some stereotypical cool dude hooking up all the time for whom forgoing one night isn't a particularly big deal. He is crushingly lonely, and really wants to believe that someone might be interested in him apart from a blackout drunken hookup. He's not trying to posture about anything, not worried about the fact that "men don't cry". Perhaps he's grown a bit too invested in this one single potential contact, but I think a lot of people can sympathize with being in a place where one act of someone reaching out to you can mean everything. (I know I certainly understand.) What he wants isn't "just" sex, it's human connection, even in something as simple as someone who texts you in the morning.

The rest of the song provides no new information, repeating the chorus and some lines recapping the events. So, final verdict? It should be pretty clear by now how diametrically opposed this story is to "Blurred Lines". In that song, without all that much evidence, the speaker insists that despite the way she presents herself to him (a "good girl" and "plastic", presumably meaning some kind of heartless rejection) he knows she wants to have sex with him, and all these lines she's blurring about consent are silly. The speaker in "Text Me in the Morning", who I wager some people wouldn't blame for going ahead with the hookup given our culture (imagine how many movies, for instance, contain the "lonely kid finally hooks up with hot drunk chick, thus winning the story" plot), instead responds to ambiguity about consent by backing off.

Here's the key part that makes me so happy about it. The song isn't boring. Stopping the "action" before getting to what you'd expect the audience to want doesn't stop the song, instead it turns and becomes about something more. It's light and cute on top, but full of dramatic possibility. Instead of an indulgent fantasy, we get ambiguity. Maybe nothing comes of it, maybe she doesn't text him, and this story ends. But maybe she does text him, and I think that's what the listener comes out of it wanting. We hope for a happy ending to the story, and given the tone of the song's conclusion (certainly upbeat and peppy), it seems there's a decent chance for that.

It feels a bit weird to be so encouraged and excited by the fact that a mildly successful pop song has an underlying message of basic gender equality. It's why I'm so glad the song doesn't, for instance, try to celebrate him for his decision. It doesn't come across as "look at me, I'm such a good guy–I totally didn't take advantage of her, aren't I the best?" Because we shouldn't be asking for prizes for being decent fucking humans. Instead, the song presents it as it should be–simply a matter of course. Go listen again to the twist in the song when he first says "Well, I couldn't stick around!" It's so defined, picked out for emphasis by some distinctive chords introducing the keyboard track to the song, making sure you pay attention while the tone of his exclamation is best characterized as "Obviously". And that's how it should be. Don't rape people. Obvious. Respect people. Obvious. Sense any "blurred lines"? Err on the side of not doing something terrible and irreversible. Obvious.

But while the song doesn't ask for any praise, I think it deserves some. Because it's a fun pop song that you certainly don't have to think too hard about, but if you do, you can enjoy what you find.

What does anyone else think? Any alternate interpretations or other recent songs you think manage to have interesting and positive gender dynamics play out subtly? I'd love for there to be a bunch more I'm missing, but this is the only one that's struck me recently. As such, I thought I'd try to spread it around a little bit.

Spotify Link     iTunes Link     Amazon Link     Google Play Link

So check it out, and then we can dance to it together (in spirit at least).

'Til next time.

Obligatory First Post

Hi internet.

So, it appears I've decided to start a blog. This is mainly because I often have reactions to things happening that I want to share or discuss online, and while writing a giant Facebook status about things can be cathartic and validating when your friends with mostly the same viewpoint read it, it rarely has a chance to spread any farther than that.

So, I shall take the first and most important step of narcissism necessary for an internet writer and assume there's someone out there who might care what I have to say, or at least find it interesting.

Let's begin, shall we?